How to talk when you’re not a talker…

You know the feeling right? When someone tells you if you talk it out you’ll feel better…


But where do you begin when you’re not a talker? Whether talking isn’t your bag, your guard is up high so you’re closed off, or you just generally feel there’s no one that would care to listen – I can tell you there IS a way!

Talking isn’t for everyone.

Being open with your emotions isn’t for everyone.

But being listened to and having your feelings acknowledged IS for everyone. It’s something everyone deserves.

If you struggle opening up and talking about how you feel with others then I may have some solutions for you!

4 ways to talk without talking…

1. Journal

Keeping a journal is like having a diary, where you document your feelings and events from the day. It’s best to do this on a daily basis where you literally write away your thoughts from the day, as well as including any highlights from the day to look back on.

You could even structure your journal to ask yourself the same 5 questions (or more) each day; particularly questions that ensure you address how you’re feeling and perhaps any negative thoughts you’d had that day.

In recent years journalling has become more popular than ever, and you can buy particular journals that are filled with specific activities based on what you’re trying to achieve. Whether that’s goal setting or help with managing your mental health, there’s a journal out there that will be exactly what you’re looking for.

Journalling is a great way to offload and feel like you’ve gotten things off your chest without having spoken to anyone.

2. Write a blog post

This is the main reason I created my blog, not only to support others and hopefully provide some useful advice, but also to help offload how I feel.

Some of my posts have been created from the very foundation of a feeling, something that has been bothering me, something I’ve been bottling up and wish to share – but I haven’t felt the courage to turn to someone and tell them.

So I scrawl my emotions into a blog post without positioning myself as the focus but the very thought and feelings I’m having are at the forefront.

I do this not only as a way to help myself, but because I’m 100% sure I’m not alone in the way I feel, and I hope by ‘opening up’ it will help others too.

3. Address yourself in the mirror

No, I haven’t lost my mind on this one – just hear me out.

When thoughts get too much and you’re feeling overwhelmed just literally talk about how you feel to yourself in the mirror.

I know this one isn’t technically talking without talking, but it doesn’t involve anyone else and ensures you face your thoughts head on by looking at yourself as you state how you feel.

Call me crazy, but yes I do this from time to time. Especially when thoughts get too much I look myself in the eye in the mirror and tell myself at least 3 times either: “Your thoughts aren’t fact”, “You’ve got this and everything will be okay”, or “You’re stronger than you think and you are needed/wanted.”

Don’t knock it until you’ve tried it!

4. Send a text, email or even write a letter

If you really want to open up to someone but you’re struggling to find the courage, then you could always send a text, email, or you could go completely classic and write a letter.

Open up with how you feel whether it’s pen to paper, or typing on a screen they will both have the same effect of offloading with how you feel.

Literally brain dump everything you are thinking and feeling and hit send, (or post it) before you give yourself a chance to have second thoughts as to whether you should be sending it or not.

Pick a person that you know will appreciate and understand the strength it took you to send them these words, and I promise you will feel heaps better for doing it.

I hope these ways of talking without talking help you in the moments you feel you need to offload, but can’t face telling someone.

I would strongly advise these tips are short term and are used occasionally, until you find the courage to fully open up to someone with how you feel. There’s nothing better than human interaction in person offloading your emotions – you will literally feel a weight lifted!

But until then – good luck and just know there’s always someone that will be willing to listen to you!

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